Decisions

“We write the story of our lives, one decision at a time” – Andy Stanley

I don’t know about you but I think that one of the most underrated things, which people seem to conveniently fail to mention about growing up, is the aspect of decision-making that life demands as you get older. It was much easier back then when the choices were between two toys you saw at the supermarket when you would go shopping with your parents, or between the blue- or red-colored “popsicles” which would usually cost about 1bob (And just then, I lost all kids born after 2000. Lol!) Regardless, decisions were very black and white back then and for the most part, they were essentially made for us. The conversations that end in “Kwa sababu nimesema” were the norm and while it felt harsh, we had it easier back then.

I look at my life now, especially as a single mum and it’s crazy just how much my decisions are no longer black and white; the grey areas are increasing with every arising issue. Honestly, the decisions that our parents or guardians made for us made our lives ridiculously easier. Each day I’m a mum, I thank God for the people who made decisions for me growing up, knowing that it wasn’t a walk in the park for them but they did what they saw best for me at the time with whatever limitations they had. For that, I greatly respect and honor them. Suddenly “Kwa sababu nimesema” doesn’t sound like a harsh command, it may just as well be “I’m doing the best I can for you with what I have. Just appreciate it and do as I say!” It brings out the vulnerability of our human state.

Now, this isn’t to make someone curl in a corner rocking back and forth out of the sheer horror of growing into responsibility. Rather, it’s to shed light on the fact that, one, those that went ahead of us show us the path to take to move towards where we are now. They didn’t have it easy and often they didn’t have the slightest clue what they were doing but did it anyway with nothing more than blind faith that it was the best decision. Honor their efforts. Who is to say you would have done better or worse in their shoes? Two, develop a healthy acceptance, not an apathetic one, that such is life. We can choose to make the best of it or resign to being tossed by whatever wave comes crashing in. Either way – whether you take on life proactively or passively – it’s a decision you have made.

The cherry on top is that God doesn’t let us do this alone. He wouldn’t expect so much of us then let us fend for ourselves without any sense of direction. His Word says “Wisdom is supreme; therefore, get wisdom. Though it cost all you have, get understanding” (Proverbs 4:7). The place of wisdom can never be overstated. Decisions have to be made within the context of wisdom otherwise we end up going through life like a blind man groping in the dark to find his way; it becomes a long and tedious process whose end is far or even possibly, never to come. Thankfully, God offers us this wisdom. James 1:5 says “If anyone lacks wisdom, he should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to him.” God understands the difficulties of this life. Even as a mum, having to make the best of your journey for you and your baby, He understands and extends His helping Hand to you.

We’ll definitely make mistakes along the way and like every decision, we have to deal with its consequences. Personally, I’m at a place in my life where I have to make some of the toughest decisions I’ve ever had to make especially with regard to my parenthood and its implications are sometimes intimidating. It can get overwhelming but I know that God would never leave my destiny to the wolves. He has a great plan for me and I intend to live long enough to find out what it is. In this life, we can’t do it on our own and thank God we don’t have to. When we choose to view the challenges optimistically, learn from our predecessors eagerly, seek wisdom hungrily and depend on God entirely, then we can be sure that adulting or not, we will be on the right track to discover the greatness that God has placed within us and in the end, have a beautiful life story carefully written one decision at a time. Please remember: Have fun on the adventure!